867-5309

I just got a text message that triggered a forgotten memory. It's Friday so I thought I'd share.

Earlier this afternoon, my phone buzzed indicating an incoming text message. The only one who TM's me is my brother; I assumed he was passing on a sibling put-down which, despite our age, still reflects our collective immaturity.

I looked at the message, and all it said was "Heading Home." I was confused. Who was heading home? And why? I looked at the number from which the message was sent; I did not recognize it and all on-line attempts to track it backward proved unsuccessful.

So I can only assume that somebody (let's call her Jenny) will go home early to an empty house and wonder why her TM-partner isn't following quickly behind.

However, this mal-addressed message reminded me of my own disastrous attempt at communication almost a year ago. I got a voice message from Drew (my brother's brother-in-law but to make things easy, I just call him my brother-in-law). I've know him since he was born and though he thinks he's a stud because he's drummer for Susan Gibson, I remember when he used to poop his pants - but only because it was three years ago.

Anyway, Drew was in town for a show. It happened to be the same day we were moving into the house. I called the number I had stored for Drew to tell him we weren't able to make the show, despite the free tickets (supposedly).

But let me warn you: my ability to reproduce dialogue is uncanny.

"Hey, dude what's up," he started.

[In my head to myself - Um, this doesn't sound like Drew, but sometimes people sound different on the phone. But keep him talking so you can find out for sure.]

"Nothin' much, dude. What're you doing today?" I replied, figuring that if he mentioned the show, I'd know it was him for sure.

"Ah, man, we're just hanging out drinking a few beers and watching the game. You should come over."

[Okay, doesn't sound like Drew, but I wonder what game is on.]

"Nah, we're pretty busy over here so maybe some other time," I say.

"That's cool. We may head out to Canyon Lake in a little bit, man. Why don't you call me later on?"

[If I've figured out I have no idea who I was talking to, why hasn't he?]

"Yeah, sure, I'll do that. Talk to you later, man." And I hung up.

I called my brother, and sure enough, Drew hadn't had that number for months.

Welcome to my life.