Through an elective process, I chose my spouse. It took me quite some time, however, to realize the full extent of the package deal.
The first several years of marriage, I felt like an outsider in-law. Their family dynamic is quite different than that of my immediate family. Birthdays are the equivalent of national holidays, national holidays are multiple-day celebrations, and every pseudo holiday is just another reason to buy a card and a present.
And each Sunday is another opportunity to hear the latest Chris story from the weekend.
The first several years of marriage, I felt like an outsider in-law. Their family dynamic is quite different than that of my immediate family. Birthdays are the equivalent of national holidays, national holidays are multiple-day celebrations, and every pseudo holiday is just another reason to buy a card and a present.
And each Sunday is another opportunity to hear the latest Chris story from the weekend.
When we first got married, Melissa's grandfather, Bob, started to sign his cards to me "Grandpa"; he'd leave the same moniker on voice mails.
My initial reaction was one of rebellion. My paternal grandfather died when I was 6; my maternal grandfather, when I was 25. I didn't want to disrespect my consanguine grandfathers by adding another; I felt it was subtraction by addition.
I quickly realized the absurdity of that and immediately felt an additional closeness to Melissa's family.
My initial reaction was one of rebellion. My paternal grandfather died when I was 6; my maternal grandfather, when I was 25. I didn't want to disrespect my consanguine grandfathers by adding another; I felt it was subtraction by addition.
I quickly realized the absurdity of that and immediately felt an additional closeness to Melissa's family.
When he was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago, we realized that every family gathering would be prefixed with "the last" - the last birthday, the last Father's Day, etc.
Three weeks ago, Bob's final birthday party coincided with my family's reunion. It was understood from the beginning that Melissa would not join me but that I would hurry back as quickly as possible to participate. Apparently, it wasn't quick enough. Bob wouldn't start lunch until I got there.
When he became too sick and had to be hospitalized last Monday, it was a pleasure to spend evenings with him even though the moments of recognition became fewer. On Friday, he made it back home in time to see the picture of his dear wife before his body shut down.
Next Friday, Bob will be buried next to his wife in the Dallas-Fort Worth National Cemetery. He will receive full military honors and will be put to rest by Taps.
The next time a car needs to be fixed, a Mav is no-called by a cheatin' ref, or a Cowboy lineman is called for holding by a cheatin' ref, we'll think of Bob and miss him.
